Tuesday, August 17
Somewhere in 1960s..A story from my Late Grandmother's Diary
"For Sangay,what he thinks is,life without crossing troubles and hurdles is at times not worth living for there wouldn't be moment of happiness or the charm of happiness cant be felt at all.In the following imaginary story,Sangay brings out the aspect of life in a rush away time..."
Officer Mindu crawled to the switch cover and finger pressed hard against the switch button that glowed the dim bulb lighting up the heaven in his hell bedroom.The sound of coughing out drops of thick blood that ardently woke up his ailing grandmother sleeping adjacent in next room.He looked back to his rolex watch,Its 1:00 am.From a freshly shattering dream that haunted life more than the harsh treatment of reality,perhaps the night he had filled up all his guts with numberless liters of alcohol, the only answer to the solution helped him fight back the justice of his fate.The aching back and nerves deteriorated the health more than tobacco smoke did cover up breathing lungs.His grandmother filled him cups of spring water that ran down and balmed his pale stomach struggling the cancerous cell counting down number of remaining days on earth.
Mindu-like the 6 sparkling stars in a crescent night, Why girls would not have a crush with him,if they have lived in his times?.Mindu could speak hindi fluently than anyone else forget about english,could recite a poem,compose songs play a professional Dramgyen and even to bagging all school rock star awards.He is a perfect traditional archer and bull's eye shooter.He even went to India through his excellent academic performance.He could speak out french somehow.
Mindu is in his late 60s.He had all the perfect begining of life that anyone wished to have crave for.In schools,a brilliant front bench chap who did never let his teachers down.He would fetch and score subject marks that never descended below 90s, a mathematics wizard,physics genius,chemistry dexter.Sometime,he even wrote a beautiful essay on behalf, that gave his girl friend-a center of literary attraction in the school.Every class,there is a mouthing of his name like the prayer chant.And Mindu for times to come,had always been an examplary ,what professors called as the finest crystal and model of models. He dare to head shaved and inspire fellow mates on every down trodden occassion.
Now people watched with wonder, how many seeds like Mindu had almighty sowed on the planet.
His story of successful journey continued and fortunate that finally he had been blessed by a handsome paying job that secured him and life of sunshine path started.That was one chapter of his life closed with successful remarks.For many a times in life,Mindu remembers one thing through all his journey of life.An unfailing trust and faith in God,perhaps he was brought out in the village through all turmoils,difficulties and shouldering family burden.He had a hardworking pious devouted father,a farmer by profession who never lead family to suffering but self reliant and independent, to him Mindu often see as his role model.
After successful completion of studies from India,Mindu settled down with life and happily married and been bestowed with a pretty daughter and sons who later grew up seeking faith in late parties than prayers in the altar,taking refuge in drugs than offering incense.Mindu later realized,it was his own fault perhaps not have taught and passed down those prayers or else could have told them stories of himself,so that they could taken it as role model and grew up as better citizens.Now they are being brought up in such a well established environmnent but without a moment of hardwork,its hard to make them realize and feel the extreme depth of natural happiness.With these moments,life had been really hard for Mindu to express the extreme inward feelings that clouded and faded all his glee of his school days although he hardly worry about the wealth.He could no more find peace even at his own home inspite of having all the latest modern infrastructure.
His own children,for him difficult even to make them understand all the realities.Mindu's wife had been a role model for gambling.Her children ever since from a baby,might not have received the motherly care.Its all in the hands of maid and baby sitter that did brought out somehow managed and untoppled.She now has to go searching for drug that would heal the pain of her beloved son.
As days passed on,the faith of life and mystery,even chanting prayers,the basic mind calming and concentration which has been Mindu's habit for years has now been lost.All he could do is,one-one turning-one-one wife.He gave his every wife a basic need such as house,and a car.
The story of his life continued,he even visit his elderly children.His initial wife had a good understanding,doesnt bother about Mindu's whereabout as long as money flows to home.Even the children later did marry and started with new beginning of life somehow.Mindu has been ignored.His own mother succumbed to death with high pressure and stresses and finally heart attack that was gifted by her beloved son.
Mindu's only true friend was a prestigious lama meditating for many years and always been away from materialistic world.With his advice,Mindu did even initiated and sponsored some good merits and deeds.The only pilgrimage that he undertook was during his father's time,that was the time when a community service was mandatory for every household and Mindu was somehow got to assist his father carrying loads to a reputed temple nearby.
Mindu's children did not heed to his words.They threw back his words,argued and his sense of giving them care and love,treating them chechy-his heartly dear as he realized was in a wrong way."I spoiled my children,and i deserved this for the justice",he uttered silently.The restless days and sleepless night hover around for every seconds of his life.
Since then life always been a burden to him.He took up alcohol and smoking as a companion.Someday he came across doctors who warned him of his failing kidney and liver.He didnt bother and that didnt mattered him even for a second thought.When he wokeup,he changed himself to come back to life and lead it peacefully,but the haunting trails did never let him escape reality bitterness.He lost all the hopes and dreams of his family and life.
For many a times,Mindu look back to life with contentment and thanked for small things that made a huge difference and height.For one thing,a mistake that he had committed,looked not as lessons,but hardest thing haunting even at his brink of death every now and then.
After life had successfully paid him back his hardwork and dedication the bitter chapters started flipping as if time did never heal and forgive for the mistakes he made.He didnt bother to look back on times,for he has now rush up everything for the last minutes of his breath
The most beautiful converation of his life was with his best friend -the lama who advised him to donate and contribute the worldly belongings to monasteries and gompas for it would help him sleep and rest in peace.
Mindu now only left with a land somewhere and his car.He sacrificed and did not find any pleasure in the worldy affairs.He sold the car and contributed half the amount for some Animal Tsithar-saving and rescuing animals from butcher/death and remaining portion donated to a monastery for construction of stupa and MANI's(prayerwheels).
The amount received through selling land was contributed to a shedra in the remotest corner.
Mindu then contemplated back to his school days and reminded of beautiful days of rockstar and of all receiving the best student award from his Principal.
His grandmother cried as she helped her dearly grand child take a last sip of water
Mindu struggled and managed to flip through the remaining pages of "Tibetan book of living and Dying" as he count down the last days on Earth and finally gave away his breath.